The Importance of Being Cute

cute |kyoōt|adjective1 attractive in a pretty or endearing way : a cute kitten.
This is one cute place.

Mind you, it's pronounced "cute-ah"

Of course the kids are cute- that's a given. I do award extra points to those children who wear small CEO style vests and jackets to school, those who carry pencil boxes that double as stuffed animals, and those who wear pigtails. They say cute things, and do cute things: But come on, they're kids; it's expected.

But you see, women carry tiny dogs in purses or in their jackets. If a dog has to suffer walking on a leash, it is comforted by a colorful sweater or small scarf. There are pet photography studios, and, yes, pet make up is available for the shoot. Big pink blushed cheeks on a white poodle; just imagine it! Across the street at the human photo studio, it would not be strange to see a grown woman posing holding a teddy bear. These same grown women wear ribbons and bows in their hair; big, bright bows, I tell you. They wear oversized shirts with pictures of animals on the front and colorful stockings underneath. The mini-est of mini skirts are completely acceptable, but showing so much as a collarbone (God forbid, cleavage!) is considered taboo! Boys and men are encouraged to dress up a bit, and the idea of America's "metro-sexual" is pretty much every guy in this city. Men's hair is often styled carefully, a full range of colors are comfortably draped around their necks: pink is not worn ironically. You know those polo shirts with the polo dude on the left? I've seen something similar is popular here- but instead of the little stitching of a man on a horse, it's a teddy bear in a flowered shirt, and it's three times the size. Cafes are decorated like sugar dreams and tree houses, ginger bread rooms and cartoons.

Cute is in the details. It's the red ribbon carefully tied around your pizza box, like a Christmas present, when you order take-out. It's the kittens stitched into the slippers sitting by the entrance to your private Wii-playing room. Cute is the handmade lap blanket available at restaurants for ladies in skirts to sit comfortably cross-legged on their cushion on the floor. Cute has draped itself over the walls surrounding the police station; a pastel colored cartoon mural depicting children offering officers lollipops, officers escorting smiling faces in the back of their little cars (presumably a misdemeanor), officers holding hands with old people. It sits on the dashboard of almost every car you care to walk by, as little plastic figures with moving parts; a tiny plastic potted plant with leaves dancing in the sun as it's owner runs an errand.

Almost every ceramic mug has a bunny or a bear on it. Most blankets and pillows feature flowers or plaid or.... well, nothing any 'good old boy' would be caught dead sleeping with. Scooters are plaid!

Women (or gay men) seem to be in charge of the interior decor of every place... Even the bank had soft colors and fresh flowers everywhere. Estrogen is flowing in the streets.

Standing in line at the Alien Registration Office, I asked Kevin to hand me some money, and this got a laugh out of our Korean Boss. How backwards, she said, for the man to hold the money! In Korea, that is the woman's job. Not bad, Korea. Not bad.

In America people are blowing money on tanning booths, sprays, and lotions while in Korea people are bleaching their skin: I suppose the grass is always greener. Plastic surgery centers are easy to find and cheaper than almost anywhere, I'm told. If you're not cute enough, you've got options.

I was given a big plate of five different fresh cut fruits compliments of the house at one restaurant where I didn't even order food: Cute.

DVD Bang: Private movie viewing room with big cumfy chaise, box of tissues for the sad movies, little pillows and a blanket, small ceramic village with ambient light above the furniture, a gigantic screen.... and in the bathroom at this place, a heated toilet seat, a hairdryer and mouthwash available. Cute.

Went to my first Korean Art Gallery. The featured artist has created huge ink paintings based on photographs of small children looking into a fish-eye lens. In some images the artist pulls the camera back so that you see a background or other figure in perfect perspective, but the main image still has that giant bubbly head.... In my favorite piece the bobblehead child is napping on the tummy of some giant monster. It's pretty great.... and you know what else it is? CUTE.

I walked into one of the music stores finally. I've eyed the displays many times, always wishing to go inside and play a guitar, fiddle, or whatever else they'd let me touch. Kevin found one he liked the other day with a cool lady running it who knew a little english. He took me there today and we played a few guitars. The lady clapped for me after a little picking, then took the travel-sized guitar I was playing with and strapped it on herself and played a little ditty that sounded a bit like old style country music. A little later, she opened a case and had me come see this hand made red guitar laying in the deeper red velvet lined interior of a very nice case. I pulled it out and gave it a strum- and it was amazing! It had a great density, a sweet sound... hand made in Korea. Kevin and I were both thrilled with it, and I decided it had to be mine. The price was more than fair, and after all, I just got paid!

What could I do? I had no choice.

It was one cute guitar!

And now, it's mine : )

cup-o-pizza, we wii cafe, and severed pig heads

so, last weekend we found the epicenter of shopping. there's this marketplace right off one of the subway stops that made my face light up like it was christmas. you've never seen anything like this! i haven't anyway... it was miles and miles of little stands set up with fresh vegetables, from commonplace to exotic; fruit of any and every kind; beautiful and colorful handmade candies and cakes; lines of fresh little fish tied together with yellow ribbon; prepared dishes you could buy by the pound; fresh cuts of meat sitting right next to, say, a severed pigs head..... and then there were socks and shirts and pillowcases and necklaces and baby clothes and quilts.... just stuff of every sort everywhere you look. most of the sellers worked very hard on their displays and made each product look beautiful and special... i wanted to buy a little of everything. people in the booths were chatting, laughing with eachother- little old women with those crinkles by their eyes that show evidence of a lifetime of smiles... in one alley a middle aged woman walking alone came up to me, took my hand and tried to tell me something... i couldn't understand all the korean she was pouring out to me, but her hands were soft and her eyes were kind, so i took it as something nice (though kevin believes she put a hex on me... but that's kevin). we watched one white and one brown puppy play-fight at our feet between a few vegetable stands as we were walking in one direction. we saw them curled up and napping together on the way back. in the end, though, i was too overwhelmed by it all to actually purchase anything. i will go again, but with a list of what i could use and a camera, too, so i can show you what i mean.

i went back to the pharmacy. kevin and i have been snot recycling centers all week; i thought i'd try out some ancient asian remedy for said problem. i went back to the little corner pharmacy with the nice ladies and was ready with my sign language. i tried out the word 'sinus' first, then 'runny nose', 'pressure'.... three strikes. so on to the hand motions. i ran my fingers from the bridge to the base of my nose and made as sad face. i pinched the very top of my nose, between my eyes, and made a moaning sound. i fake coughed. this time, all the kind ladies were into the game, but they all looked completely puzzled and made no guesses.... until one woman sitting behind me stood up and said in perfect english, "you have a cold?"

yeah.

and what do they give me? no special herbs to mash and put in tea. no weird root to suck on or put under my pillow at night. no powders. nope.

tylenol cold and sinus.

so there ya go.

the cold is really annoying- i'm happy it's trailing off and cannot wait until it's completely gone. it's had a way of draining all my energy since it showed up- so this has been a rather uneventful week all in all. if i wasn't working, i was sleeping.

we did manage to have a little fun tonight, though. we were finished a little earlier than usual at school, and went to a place called the 'we wii' cafe. there, we paid 3.50 a piece for a coffee and were shown to a private room where we could enjoy our coffee with our very own giant flatscreen and a wii. if you want an extra hour, you buy another coffee.

across the street from the we wii cafe there is a pizza stand that will sell you a slice for about a dollar... and do you know how they hand you that slice? do you, friends?

they do it steve-martin's-the-jerk-style, kids: that's right! it's pizza in a cup! color me tickled.

Lost in translation...

these are the days of the week as translated by our fancy technology. i'm not sure which is sunday and which is friday... but these are, indeed, supposed to represent the seven days:

1. Weep with Abandon

2. Like the Apple of One's Eye

3. The Scum of Soy Sauce

4. A Fiddlestick

5. A Sentence

6. Mad as a Hatter

7. Fifty Heads of Chicken

Ok, well, I'll see you guys next The scum of Soy Sauce! Can't wait!!!

try it- it's fun!

oh, yeah...

and the tea kettle sounds exactly like a harmonica.

details i've failed to mention

on any given busy street, there are carnival aspects- like a few "grab the prize" games, some dart throwing games, some test-your-strength games... some manned, some coin operated, and next to some games you'll find a little shop where you can use your winnings to buy giant stuffed animals or silly jewelry.... or giant combs, what have you.

'street vendors' often set up their booths featuring a small selection of hot food, surrounded by a small plastic tent, and there are up to four small stools inside, so you can enjoy your street snack away from the crowd.

now and then, there is samuri-movie-soundtrack style music playing over a loudspeaker that you can hear faintly anywhere in the city. i hope to see some ninja murders or cowboy showdown at some point...

gwangju is nestled in mountains, and there is a bus... bus 1187, which we can easily hop on by our house. it will drive us halfway up a nearby mountain and drop us off at a hiking trail. all along this hiking trail there are a variety of interesting little restaurants and cafes. oh, and it's spring... sounds like a good formula for a day off.

there is no shower stall in our bathrooms here, but rather a shower head attachment connected to the sink, and mounted above it. at first i was a bit put off, until i looked at it a little differently; we now have a giant shower stall that has a hand sink AND a toilet inside! mega convenience!

know those water dispensers with cold water and very hot water? got em. every-stinkin-where. so if you want hot tea or instant coffee while you wait or work in any building or restaurant- ta-da! presto!

saw in a window a t-shirt that read: DIRTY BURGER

those cool students i mentioned? yeah, they give a polite head bow when we cross paths in the stairwell. a bow.

all that stuff we read about people dressing very nice at schools... turns out to not apply at our particular place. most teachers wear jeans. the clothes i packed and wear daily look fancy and rich to the students... they don't believe me when i say i'm not rich, in fact. ah, well

there is pizza here, but corn is a standard topping and the fancier pizza tastes a lot like pizza hut...

cute little dogs and some raggedy cats roam the streets and survive well off of garbage.

recycling is standard here- everywhere and anywhere, expect to recycle.

um.............. very tired now... more later.

Um... Kevin Gerke is stinkin' cute as a teacher, and every coworker and student I have here has affirmed this. Also, Gwangju is beautiful.

What else?.... Well, our boss treated all the teachers to a delicious and unreasonably huge lunch today- they got us good and full, then served a bunch of other courses. I adore our direct boss, Me Yin, and her boss seems cool, and reminds me of dear Mrs. Gisela back home in St. Franny.

My students are awesome. They are bright, imaginative, studious, and funny. Once a week they have speaking practice and present a short essay they've written on a given topic: Today's presentations were on Something Ugly. Sure, plenty of students talked about jellyfish, mud, poo-poo flies, spiders, etc... but a couple of these guys pulled out deep issues, like nuclear weapons, fighting, money and murderers. They amaze me in new ways each class.

And now, it is officially the weekend! I haven't had that to be excited about since I was in high school myself. But here we are- two full days to play! YEA!!!

I get a little personal...

I played charades today with seven old ladies at a little local pharmacy. I walked in with the name of an over the counter birth control pill offered in Korea, thinking accepting this switch would be much easier than trying to fill my handwritten prescription from Atlanta. Birth control is very unpopular here- couples opt instead to use the 'gambling' method. Oddly, though, what they do offer does not require a prescription and is rather cheap- only about 5-8 American dollars per month! But this particular shop was unfamiliar with the brand I was informed by the interwebs was widely used by foreigners in Korea.... When I showed them the name of the drug, one woman behind the counter nodded and emptied two pills from a big jar into a little bag for me. I hesitated.. tried to communicate that it should be a month's supply... and the game was on. Imagine pantomiming "I need pill to take every day to NOT get pregnant" to middle aged and, shamefully, grandma aged Korean ladies... use hand gesture to indicate giant, round belly... then make a big X with your arms.... and they nod in understanding... offer Gas-X... I try again. One lady finally pulled out a little English, and translated that I needed something to take EVERY DAY.. and they looked puzzled: WHY everyday? NO PREGGO! They didn't understand pregnant, they didn't understand hormone pills, they didn't understand birth control... I was ready to give up when my English-dabbler suggests a fuzzy version of "Contraceptive?" And I beamed! Yes! Contraceptive! WTF? That was the word they got! Every lady cheered like we'd all just been awarded the SECOND showcase! And they ceremoniously handed the little box from one to the other until I received it, paid my 7000 won, and left victorious.

(don't worry, all my lady friends- i did do all that research i should and found this drug should be a seamless transition)

Meanwhile, my job is super. I was very proud of my students today: Now that I've got a firmer understanding of exactly what level each class is at (their age does not necessarily indicate their experience with the language), I am better able to offer appropriate challenges in their lessons, and recognize which classes need to step away from their steady progress in the assigned workbooks and focus on grasping a few fundamentals better before forging on. I made up an activity on the fly that involved unscrambling sentences, and, well, I'm probably completely boring you by now... so suffice it to say, I am able to have fun with these kids while being really creative in my approach and they're absorbing new information like dried out sponges and it feels good, good, good.

I think the challenge of suddenly living together along with suddenly living halfway across the world from all our other loved ones has proven more taxing on Kevin and I than either of us expected, but he's a really amazing person, and I try to keep up... so in the end, we're making it all work. It gets frustrating for us both in different ways and on various levels each new day. I know he's a more private person in ways, and will be relieved to have a room of his own very soon. We will both be glad when we get our first paycheck and can let out our belts a little. We're not suffering, mind you, but being extra careful, and going without some luxuries that would feel really comforting in this time of adjustment... but all in good time. Paint brushes, instruments, and a full pantry are just around the corner.

If I had my packing to do over, I would have brought a book full of pictures to put up of all of you I miss and a book of dvds.

I suspect I will be buying too many shoes after a while, too. Just mentioning. They're so freaking adorable here!!!!!!!!

For dinner tonight we ate BURGERS- and they were delicious. Gourmet burgers, handmade wheat buns, fresh meat mixed with egg, topped with bbq sauce a-la-perfection, bacon, cheese, fresh tomato, lettuce (FRESH LETTUCE!!!) and onion, and hot delicious FRIES and a side of pickled veggies and peppers. It totally satisfied a little craving and more, and cost about $8.... came with a bread and honey appetizer and a big fancy hazelnut coffee after. Oh, Korea, how you treat my tummy good.

In the mean time, Kevin has found a Korean Mama- She throws food at him everywhere they go- even peels his little baby oranges for him and sends him home with pastries. He's getting totally pampered at his new school- You can probably find more on this in his blog... but it's a pretty sweet deal for both of us, really.

We really lucked out with this city and this school... couldn't ask for a better fit.

Ah, ok- g'night, or g'morning- whatever the case may be.

P.S.- if you were interested in writing, it is best to send to to us care of our school; here is the address: Jisan Hangil English School, 154-2 Dongmyeong-dong, Dong-gu, Gwangju, South Korea, 501-813

it's like building a house

with your two hands, a pile of bricks, and a bucket of mortar you bought at half off on the street corner.

you just do your best and hope it'll hold.

I'm not saying the excitement is fading.

I'm not trying to imply I have any regrets here.

This is all so wonderful in so many ways. I must admit, though, I am finally calming down enough to realize all the little and big things I really won't have for a year.

It's a rather isolating feeling to have this language barrier. I struggle over understanding how much I owe after a meal, over telling a cab driver where I need to go, over buying a ticket for the bus. Imagine the difficulty I would have in finding out a stranger's hobbies and interests. Fortunately, there are certainly a handful of English speaking natives and expatriates- so there is a chance at good conversation in the near future; and this weekend was an amazing opportunity to catch up with my friend Shira in Seoul and also to meet several new friends from America, Canada, Ireland, and Scotland. It was a spectacular time- I even got to sing karaoke in the famous 'nori bang'.... a private room so you can take as many turns as you want and only your friends are there to hear! I was especially proud and surprised to find "Wig in a Box" for Kevin to sing- even further surprised that everyone in the room knew it, too! It was a beautiful night.

I realize I am going to have to work harder to latch on to the other english speakers here in Gwangju if I don't want to turn into a bit of a hermit.

I also really miss my guitar. I have a pretty serious plan in my mind to buy a violin while I'm here- though that may be a few months off. There are at least five adorable little music shops in walking distance from my apartment- but I am holding out hope that I'll come across a second hand one. Yes, less expensive, sure- but even more importantly, I would like the wood and strings to be a little broken in... more ready for me. Also, I am waiting until we move into the larger place, so me and my new friend don't drive Kevin insane.

As usual, music is my saving grace. Right now I'm the only person in a sweet little coffee shop, Serendip- one of the few open before noon (this town likes to sleep in and stay up late)... the ceiling over me is all windows, I'm sitting on a wooden swing with cushions (I've said it before, I will again: These guys have the market cornered in Cute) and who should I hear singing to me but Damien Rice? I am transported.

And yesterday morning, trying hard to get over the effects of Soju from our big night out, woken by the sun, I was gently serenaded back to sleep by a single violinist practicing a classical piece somewhere in a nearby building.

A lot of you who know me well already know this about me- but for those still learning my quirks, I'll spell it out: I have a hard time predicting how I'll feel. I don't think forward well, so consequences and effects of my own actions strangely take me off-guard. Remember when I moved to Texas and most of you got to say "I told you so" for six months? : )

Well, turns out all those things I said "I ain't scared" to are already biting me- and I see where my difficulties will lie.

I'm not too worried, though.

You should see the way the sun is shining today.

And another good song is coming on.

Wendy's

Today, my dear friends, is April 2, 2010. In certain branches of the Christian faith, this means it is officially 'Good Friday'. "Dante's Inferno" spins a stunningly vivid tale that begins on this very date in 1300, following Dante's journey through 9 circles of Hell. I mention this because I had a thought today... a crazy idea, maybe, but a thought that bothered to stick with me; and what my brain suggested was this:

If the poem strikes any truth, by chance, and there are 9 levels of Hell; perhaps there are just as many levels of Heaven. Perhaps the amazing outpour of love, affection, hugs, and warm wishes that saw us off was the first ring? Perhaps our landing, cushioned by kind new friends, a cozy new home, and a beautiful bustling city, was the second. Hmmmmm.

Mind you, the "Hmmmm" has a special inflection. It starts at a middle tone, and sing-songs down the throat to a bass note. It's neither short nor long. I notice this sound of thinking in the speech of every person I have spoken with at length here- child or adult, Korean or American... Or Canadian, for that matter. It's catchy. It allows an extra second to think out a reply, or it can end a conversation. "Yes, that was one of the craziest days of my life! Hmmmmmm."

Joshua, a fellow Atlanian ESL teacher at our school, took Kevin and I around the downtown area today- showing us important places to remember like the bank, the post office, the Baskin Robbins, a small grocer that has real cheese and chips and salsa! We ate SamBap (spelling may be off), cooked over a fire at the table- pork and onions we made lettuce wraps of with all the trimmings, as usual (these people know how to satisfy a taste for variety at the table!) A local that Joshua knew came in and taught us to say 'bathroom' in Korean, and the three of us practiced several rounds before realizing we were just chanting "BATHROOM!" again and again in a busy restaurant. oops. Once I grasped the word securely I went to the cashier to ask where it was, but had to cross back across the restaurant to grab my shoes from the front door, carried them across the restaurant to the back door, put them on, went outside and down a hall to where she had pointed, then realized it is a national fact that you, the individual, are solely responsible for your toilet paper needs. Ah, a city-wide fact, I guess... I'll see if it's nation wide tomorrow when we go to Seoul. But more importantly- this FOOD, I do declare! THIS FOOD!

With the feast of a king before me with no filling soda and minimal starches involved, I don't so much get full as I get tired of eating! Chopstick assembly line with a million options for every bite! I just wear out of the activity after a while!

We are moving to a bigger apartment downstairs in 20 days- and today some ladies from our school brought over some stuff for us: Come to think of it, it was a tiny bit Eastery- walking into our apartment after work to find a bunch of presents inside the doorway! We got new pots and pans and utensils, cleaning supplies, a drying rack for clothes (dryers are RARE here), shampoo, a tea pot and coffee maker. With this new stuff I was prepared to try my hand at cooking! These are some pics of my first Korean cuisine attempt: It went fairly well! Buckwheat noodles, tofu, sesame leaves, some very potent horseradish oil, some nuts... and some fresh apples... oh, yeah, and KIMCHI!

Kevin's working at figuring out what the settings on the washing machine say. We're going to see SHIRA tomorrow in Seoul, and have dinner with about 100 other white strangers. The weather is at perfect, my heart is light, my brain is being fully stimulated for the first time in much too long, and I think we're entering the third circle soon.

Love.

footnotes:

*any mention of heaven/hell were used hypothetically and poetically

*no animals were hurt in the making of this post or this meal

seven ATE nine!

My first day teaching my very own classes contained all of the following except one:

* "Dinosaurs became extinct because a giant jellyfish ate them all."

* "A man asked his wife one morning over coffee, please pass the sugar, honey... the next day they were having dinner and he said, please pass the pork, pig!" hahaha

* A light fixture flickered, smoked, then spit out fiery sparks

* I realized I say "ya'll" incessantly.

* I was given some of those yummy ginger chews to keep me busy

* Children knew the word 'patriarch' but not 'whale'

* I was smooth as vanilla pudding under all the pressure

* A student told the joke of 789 and explained why it is funny as her oral presentation.

* I found out "wearing a hat to class" was listed by Kevin's students as an example of bad manners in Korea after spending an hour wearing a hat in class.

* I was called "teacher" no less than fifty times: the students refer to us as only this, not miss so-and-so or mr. whatnot

Can you find the one that doesn't belong?